An alternative perspective on Steps
The way my family fights sometimes, you’d never guess how much we love each other. A similar dynamic in the addiction treatment community sucks away our energy and keeps us from focusing on our common goals.
I have learned that it is not within my power to keep my family—or the treatment community—from fighting. But I also have learned there are some things I can do to make it better: focus on common ground, and always be respectful of others’ point of view. It is in that spirit that I offer this column.
The 12 Steps can facilitate, and have facilitated, miraculous changes in people’s lives. For others, they barely make an impression. For this second group, there are plenty of alternatives.
For example, Women for Sobriety (https://womenforsobriety.org) has a Thirteen Statement program that is gender-specific. Secular Organizations for Sobriety (www.cfiwest.org/sos/intro.htm) is designed for those who dislike the religious overtones of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA).
SMART Recovery (www.smartrecovery.org) has a four-point program that it calls “incompatible” with the traditional Steps. Rational Recovery (https://rational.org) goes further, advising addicts to avoid recovery groups and substance abuse counselors, who it sees as part of the problem. LifeRing (https://lifering.org) simplifies things with just one step: Don’t drink or use, no matter what.
Pantheoretical steps
In our field, few topics cause such heated discussion as 12-Step vs. other kinds of recovery. Presented below are Pantheoretical Steps designed to promote discussion and move toward reconciliation. They are designed to focus on our common ground, and to be respectful of a wide variety of approaches:
1. I refuse to let my relationship with alcohol or drugs define who I am.
2. I am capable of taking charge of my life, and creating something better than I have now.
3. I am making a commitment to use all the resources at my disposal to achieve a better life.
4. I’m increasing my self-awareness by taking a close look at myself, my environment, and my goals for the future.
5. I’ve identified the personal and external resources I have at my disposal to achieve these goals.
6. I forgive myself for all the poor choices I have made in the past.
7. I am ready to accept the help of others when I need it.
8. I’ve made a list of big mistakes I’m never going to repeat.
9. I’m ready to celebrate life without the use of alcohol or other drugs.
10. I pledge to continue my journey of growth and self-discovery.
11. I know I’ll make mistakes, but I won’t stop trying.
12. I understand that helping others is a way to find meaning and happiness in my own life.
The first step here is compatible with AA’s Step One, even though the original includes an admission of “powerlessness.” The ultimate goal of the Steps, and all recovery programs, is to empower. This first step begins where change begins: acknowledgement of a problem with the status quo, and a desire for something different.
This second step acknowledges possibilities and potential, as does AA’s Step Two.
This third step calls for a commitment to change, as does AA’s Step Three. AA’s first three Steps have been called the Foundation Steps. In the Transtheoretical (Stages of Change) Model, completion of these first three steps brings one to the “preparation” stage.
Increased self-awareness is a prerequisite to any successful change, and is called for here and in AA’s Step Four.
This fifth step broadens the scope of the traditional Step Five by including identification of assets as well as deficits. Client-centered and solution-focused approaches strive to identify specific resources to be used in a plan of action.
Shame and low self-esteem often accompany substance abuse, and this sixth step and AA’s Step Six call for a readiness to remove these obstacles to meaningful and lasting change.
This seventh step and Step Seven call for continued progress toward identifying internal resources, acknowledging one’s limitations, and requesting and accepting help when necessary.
This eighth step and Step Eight acknowledge past mistakes, with a call for the vigilance that keeps us from repeating the most harmful ones.
Through reflection, personal growth and direct action, this ninth step and Step Nine help us build a better future.
The idea of “keeping it green” and never resting on one’s laurels is another key to success that is recognized in this 10th step and in AA’s Step 10.
This 11th step and Step 11 call for us to use each unhelpful choice as a learning opportunity.
Finally, in the respective 12th steps, there is acknowledgement of a growing body of evidence that confirms that connecting with each other in mutually beneficial relationships constitutes a key ingredient of happiness.
Nicholas A. Roes, PhD, author of Solutions for the ‘Treatment-Resistant’ Addicted Client (Haworth Press, 2002; reviewed in the January 2003 issue of Addiction Professional), is Executive Director of the New Hope Manor residential treatment facility in upstate New York. His e-mail address is NickARoes@aol.com and his website is www.nickroes.com.
